Whether we realise it or not, how we were raised has a tremendous impact on how we make decisions as adults.
1. Your Parents Were Very Frugal
The behaviour: Whether they needed to keep a tight
budget, were trying to teach you a lesson or were choosing to put
themselves first financially, they seemed to deny you of everything you
wanted as a kid.
The influence: You overspend to compensate.
The solution: Talk to your parents about the reasons
for their choices. There may be more to their decision than you
understood when you were young.
2. Your Parents Spoiled You
The behaviour: Perhaps your parents were deprived as
children themselves, and in response, they chose to overspend on you.
The influence: You feel entitled to have a luxurious
lifestyle.
The solution: Shift your sense of entitlement from
having a lot of “stuff” now to having financial freedom later.
3. Your Parents Were Extremely Charitable
The behaviour: Perhaps they grew up poor or
experienced some kind of trauma firsthand. In response, they chose to
invest their time and money in causes that they were passionate about.
The influence: Your heart is in the right place, and
so were your parents’. But you may give more money away than you can
really afford to out of guilt or obligation.
The solution: Decide which causes are most important to you and make a charitable gift budget now that is within your means for next year.
4. Your Parents Never Taught You About Money
The behaviour: This is a very common problem and
often due to the subconscious perpetuation of their own parents’ lack of
financial education.
The influence: You are money foolish — and probably
in a variety of ways, whether it is overspending, undersaving or
avoiding investing and/or financial planning in general.
The solution: Get educated.
5. Your Parents Badmouthed the Stock Market
The behaviour: Whether they lived through the Great
Depression, took a big hit during the 1987 or they have chosen to put their money
in the safest place possible…under the bed.
The influence: You avoid investing in stocks
altogether.
The solution: Be careful and strategic with your
investing decisions. This means doing sufficient research and asking
questions.
6. Your Parents Lived Large
The behaviour: Maybe they were compensating for being
deprived as kids or they felt the need to keep up with the Joneses.
The influence: You live beyond your means, too.
The solution: If you can’t go as far as physically
removing yourself from an environment that tempts you too much to
overspend, then you need to put constraints in place to force yourself
not to. That means setting up automatic transfers to save money you
would otherwise spend and dedicating an account and debit card just for
discretionary spending.
7. Your Mother Was Dependent
The behaviour: Whether she married one man of means
or multiple men, your mum was taken care of and did not have to worry
about money.
The influence: You too are expecting Prince
Charming. Why should you have to struggle if your mum didn’t have to?
The solution: Wake up from this unrealistic fairytale! Stop waiting to be saved and instead, save yourself.
8. Your Parents Divorced
The behaviour: This is an unfortunate reality for so
many families and a major contributor to all kinds of psychological
issues in kids, including those that fuel poor money decisions.
The influence: You are determined to live happily
ever after. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it can also lead you
to jump into marriage, buy a house and start a family prematurely or
for the wrong reasons.
The solution: Make a commitment to always be
financially independent even if you do marry or are already married. If you happen to significantly outearn
your potential mate, you may also want to consider a prenuptial
agreement as a practical, protective measure.